The fact that Moonshine Grill has an abundance of rocking chairs on their front porch should tell you something: you're going to leave this place with an incredibly full stomach. So full that you might oscillate on said rocking chair for twenty minutes while the valet guys stare at you in amusement, possibly placing bets on when you will be able to move again. I recall once gazing over at a friend (post-meal) from my chair who reminded me somewhat of a dying insect; she was completely immobile, apart from the sporadic twitch in her limbs occurring just enough times to show me she was still alive. Yeah, that about summarizes Moonshine.
Moonshine has a unique history. According to their website, the building itself dates back to the 1830s and is one of the oldest commercial buildings in all of Austin. It has hosted numerous businesses throughout the years (one store occupied the space for a consecutive 98 years!) and of course, has gone through numerous renovations and restorations. One thing that has remained the same since 1866 however, is the original limestone walls, cedar posts, ceilings, and interior beams in the "Sunday House." The Sunday House is used for private parties and events, and can be appreciated by anyone interested in architectural restoration and design. With this said, Moonshine, established in 2003, is now an established restaurant in Austin, luring college students and families alike to feast on classic American comfort food for about $15-$40. They have a terrific happy hour in terms of appetizers, and they are also open for lunch and dinner with items ranging from classic ceasar salads, and pecan crusted catfish, to portobello paninis, pork tenderloin, steaks, calamari, buffalo meatloaf, and more. I recently found myself there for my third visit on Easter Sunday, waiting in an all too familiar line. 
Now for a word on buffets...I'm not really an all-you-can-eat buffet girl, in fact, I was trying to evade the whole Easter buffet frenzy all morning, but I guess Americans think God enjoys seeing them pig out and slip into a coma on holy days. Consequently, buffets are almost unavoidable, but I still tried to make a reservation at an Easter-friendly non-buffet spot anyway. Around 1:45PM, my brunch time was decreasing and I decided on Moonshine. The last time I ate at Moonshine, I ordered from the lunch menu (and didn't pay thanks to credit-card roulette), so I completely forgot that they too participate in troth feedings on Sunday. So, clearly when I walked into the restaurant, I was ill-prepared and disappointed when they handed me a $25 empty plate to fill myself. Lucky for me, they won the Austin Chronicle reader's poll for "best buffet" in 2009, as well as their "best Sunday brunch," and their "best American food." Jackpot.
As usual I was starved and was therefore immediately overcome by over-stimulation. A variety of colors, textures, and smells of various foods flashed by my eyes like a lifetime of blurred memories. Hoards of people were traveling in all directions like a human ant farm. Chaos ensued and Moonshine truly became a nonsensical fantasy in itself. I found myself holding two plates, ignoring all descriptions, and saying "yes" to anything that could fit on my platter. There was no elegance about my behavior. No organization, theme, or presentation could be found on my plate. I was so enthralled with excitement and greed that at that moment, I think every inherent animal instinct inside me came out. The elder woman in front of me was no longer a kind grandmother, she was just a bigger cat, blocking me from my kill. The sweet potatoes with marshmallows transformed me into a spoiled, domesticated dog that won't stop eating until he is sick. At one point, my vegetarian companion literally called out to me, "Should I just eat chicken??" It was then that I realized buffets are pure evil. I slapped my friend and myself and we sat down to our four plates of food. Between the two of us, we managed to fit corn bread, sweet potatoes, bread pudding, mashed potatoes, banana bread, mac and cheese, BBQ chicken, salad, scrambled eggs, waffles, cheesecake, and fruit on our plates. You would think that this is the sad part of the story, but no, the true tragedy is that we both went BACK for a third plate. My only defense is that it was $25 (Easter priced, normally only $16) and we wanted to get our money's worth. That's understandable right? RIGHT?? Now, I don't want to admit this part, and I thought to leave it out because I am so ashamed, but I promised I'd be honest with you...I stuffed more banana bread in my pocket wrapped in a napkin before we left! Please don't think differently of me. Now you know the truth as to why I don't do buffets...because I truly eat all I can eat.
We meandered out to the rocking chairs and idly sat on the porch digesting with both delight and disgust. The only positive outcome I can extrapolate from this episode is that we could both confidently host Woman vs. Food if ever given the chance.
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